Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Quis sed officia eum accusantium animi.

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t cotton to rapists

I see through liars

How do I make an instrumental version of a Hindi song?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Is it possible to achieve spiritual enlightenment while being in a romantic relationship?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I actually pay taxes

Bruins acquire former first-round pick in trade with Blackhawks - Boston.com

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Google quietly released an app that lets you download and run AI models locally - TechCrunch

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Beavis and Butt-Head Are Coming to Call of Duty: Black Ops 6 and Warzone With Season 04 Reloaded — and Players Are Joking They’re More MilSim Than Most Skins in the Game - IGN

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Rocks reveal the turning point when oxygen changed Earth forever - Earth.com

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

What is an appropriate response to someone saying "merci" in French?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have a reading level above third grade

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Has Pope Francis signed a document that gay men can now become priests?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Order of selection for 2025 NHL Draft - NHL.com

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I can read

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Aaron Rodgers says decision to sign with Steelers 'was best for my soul' - NFL.com

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why is Elon Musk so ugly?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

New iOS 26 design makes me want an iPhone 17 Air more than ever - 9to5Mac

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Archer Aviation Stock Tumbles: Here’s What This Investor Predicts Next - TipRanks

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What is the sluttiest thing your wife has ever done?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand how hurricane paths work